The onlyproblem was that I also realized that if I had the choice, I'd rather bethe one bouncing up and down on a dick, making chipmunk sounds like a bitchin heat. God, I couldn't wait to see Dev again.Sunday couldn't get here fast enough. I called Dev in the afternoon and gotvoicemail."Hey man, I was just wondering if you wanted to hang out tonight..." I saidtrying not to sound so needy.Dev never called back. I was crestfallen and felt that black hole in my gutagain.Monday went by and I still didn't hear from him. I left him anothermessage. "Hey Dev, it's Josh. Um, I was just wondering if you wanted tohang out sometime this week. I'd love to see you man..." I was definitelya pitiful needy bitch.Late Monday night, I was lying in bed staring at the ceiling when my cellphone rang."Hey man, how you doing?" Dev asked benignly."I'm good, man, good to hear from you." God, I sounded like such a dork."Yeah, sorry it took me a while to get back, I was busy, you know what I'msayin'?" he said. Let me do it, sir. Please?" Oh, no, Sister Susan. I must find a woman of the street.a prostitute. I will renounce my vows and find a prostitute. I can ask her to do it." Let me, Father? Let me be your whore like I was when you were fuh... fuh... fucking me?" the gullible novitiate asked. "I should be the one to renounce my vows, sir? It's my fault." You're so wonderful, my child. You wouldn't have to renounce your vow. Not if you did it. But I can't ask you. You would despise me." Oh, No, Father. I wouldn't. I'd do anything for you. You know that. What do you want me to do, sir? Let me do it." But, Sister? You know I can't let him loose in your vestal jewel box. You would be re-possessed if I did. It must be in your... no... I couldn't ask you to take it there. But we might be able to get rid of it in your... Oh, no, my child. I can't ask that." the lustful priest said in a halting, sincere voice."Where, Father Murphy? Where can you release it? Tell me, please? Tell me?" the Novice.
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