Then I looked at her, and tried to formulate something to say to come out that I liked her and see if she liked me, she just silently looked at me while I mumbled, "So, I'm off work, and I was thinking, if you want…"She then spoke up, "There is one thing. I'm right handed, so I haven't been able to…in a while," and she reached into her groceries and pulled out the box of condoms.I looked at her again and now all the dots connected. Her right arm in the cast was why she'd stopped buying cucumbers and condoms. She couldn't masturbate. Stupidly I asked, "You couldn't with your left?"She looked immediately flustered, "I'm sorry, never mind. I'll see you next week. I…" and she went past me to open the door for me to leave, but I stopped her by placing one hand on her shoulder."No, I… I'd love to help any way I can. Really," I said hoping I'd not lost my shot. My internal monologue said that she didn't like me and just wanted a cucumber she didn't have to hold, but I'd show her I. You still haven’t answered my question.’ ‘I’m moving, Ted.’ ‘What do you mean? Your lease up on your place?’ ‘Yeah, but I mean, I’m really moving…. Up north… she doesn’t know yet.’ ‘Wait, what?’ ‘Ted, I really need you two to settle things.’ Matt turned to look at Ted. ‘Until you do, there’s this… this dirtiness hanging over everything. This guilt of, what if, and I can’t live with that, and it’s tearing her up. Even when she pretends to be okay, I mean, I’ve known her for years. I can tell when she’s faking.’ ‘You ever think maybe she just needs to get over it? I’m not angry with her, I don’t hate her, I just have nothing left to say.’ Ted shrugged, looking towards Matt. ‘She’ll get over it.’ ‘It’s been what? Two, three years? She isn’t getting over it. I don’t know what it is. Anytime your name comes up, she just… you can see it in her eyes, she’s trying to tune it out because she’s given up on thinking she won’t care.’ ‘What do you care? You guys are just fucking.’ Perhaps it was.
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