”The new commander called the old one to ask what the reason was, and the previous commander said; “I don’t know. The commander before me had guards on the bench, so I just kept it going.”After contacting three previous commanders as well, and still getting the same answer, the new commander finally found a retired General (nearly 100 years old) and asked; “Sir, I am the new commander at the base you were in charge of 60 years ago. I found two men assigned to stand guard on a bench near the mess hall. Can you please tell me why?”After a pause, the General replied; “What? Is the paint still wet?”????????????????Thank tavern_knight for this one~“So when the first pig asked the man for straw to build his house with...”“What do you think the man was thinking?”One of the teacher’s students in the back of the room, called out, “Fuck me, a talking pig.”????????????????A well planned retirementThere is a lot written about this story. Apparently, it is a long-standing myth, but such a popular. These aren’t those eyes.“How could you?”“How could I what?” Whatever this was about, my Latin nature was raising its emotional response.“You just decide to go off to spend most of the night fucking?”I stepped toward him but his hands come up as if they would emit some force field to hold me back. Wherever this was coming from, now I was pissed. “Look at me, damnit! Look at me!” I stood before him. arms out to the side. I knew what I looked like at that moment. Naked. Stockings and heels. I could still feel the semen of three men inside me and I didn’t doubt that he could see the shine of it on the insides of my thighs. “This is what YOU wanted. This is what you want to display, exhibit, show off. This is what you wanted to share with others. Remember? This was YOU.”“You went off without … you just went off by yourself … you just decided …” He was whining. God! It sounded so pathetic.It made me even more pissed. “Fuck you! YOU had this night planned! You always plan these things. You.
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