She needs me to be able to do this.’ Lauren walked into the kitchen where Julia was busy toasting bread. ‘Want anything in particular?’ she stole yet another kiss from Lauren. ‘I like this part.’ Lauren told herself. ‘Um, the toast looks good.’ ‘Orange juice or milk?’ ‘Juice will be fine. Anything you need help with?’ ‘No, I’ve got it all under control.’ Julia set a plate down with toast and a cup of juice for Lauren and sat across from her with a cup of coffee. ‘What’s it like when you panic Lauren? What do you hear in your mind?’ it was a stiff probing question from Julia. She paused for a moment. ‘She should know. It’s not some dirty little secret.’ ‘It changes. Mostly its white noise of thoughts that I can’t focus on one thought.’ ‘What’s in those thoughts?’ What was in those thoughts that caused the anxiety just earlier? Lauren played with the crusts of her bread trying to formulate the answer. ‘I don’t know. I guess it was weird waking up here. I didn’t expect to. I don’t. “Well in the condom anyway. Lisa had a box by the bed even though she knows I had the ‘snip’’. He thought for another second before asking almost threateningly. “Did Paul… cum…inside you too?” “Yes…” I replied as softly as I could then suddenly shot back in my seat. “Oh my God!” I exclaimed in a hoarse whisper as realisation dawned. It had clearly dawned on Tom too. “Didn’t you use any… protection?” He asked almost inaudibly, as if unwilling to utter the words. My heart stopped and my blood ran cold. “Oh my God! Oh my God!” Was all I could reply. “What? You didn’t?” “I didn’t think. You and I never need it so… I didn’t think!” “Christ! You let him cum in you unprotected? All those times?” “Oh my God!” “You could be pregnant!” “Jesus! Tom I’m so sorry…” “He could have knocked you up already! How many times did you do it?” “Three. No, four! I don’t knowwww!” I confessed, my head sinking into my chest. “Four times? And you slept with it all inside you all night?” I nodded, my eyes quite.
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