But I fucking wasn't and she fucking knew it! She KNEW she was everything to me. GOD. I was going round and round in my head, looking for some fucking answer and it was driving me fucking crazy. I kept bouncing around in there, my thoughts careening off my freaking skull, pounding over me. I. JUST. COULDN'T. DO. THIS. ANY. MORE.I kept making excuses. I kept trying to figure out what I had done to cause this. I kept pinning this shit back on me ... but the truth was that it wasn't me. This had been going on long before I came into the picture. She'd fucking said so ... but I didn't want to hear that did I? No. I fucking didn't want to believe that anyone I loved could fucking rip my fucking guts out and watch me slowly bleed to fucking death.As always I was willing to bear the brunt. I was willing to be the fucking doormat that the whole goddamn world could walk right over. Welcome, just dry your fucking feet off on the Marc. Don't mind him, he can carry the weight of the whole fucking. But I like the pics. They make me hot.' After a while we went from online messaging to texting. Or better, sexting. Using pics and messages. Sometimes chatting up to 3 hours. He always wants pictures of my big, Black juicy ass. I got to see his real pics. I don't know if I ever mentioned to him how much I like white guys. His cock actually was thicker and made me wetter than the one on his profile. I love telling him that. I love telling him how hot he makes me. I also would say things to make sure he would always make me smile. We had been keeping in touch through texting for so long it felt like some sort of relationship. When it progressed to real life I eventually dismissed the fantasy. Though my part as Mistress somehow never completely takes a backseat. The intent of us chatting had become something of another nature, so allowing him to using pet names felt proper. I did the same. 'I'm here, baby.' I text after I pull my car into the apartment building and go to the lobby door..
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