Could I go to school like this afterall? One thing was certain: no matter whether I was going to wear girlclothing in the future, I wanted to have long hair no matter what. Atleast as long as his."I really don't believe it," he said in place of a greeting, "but weactually don't need a stylist. Who did your make-up?" I did." I was a little surprised that he didn't give me credit for that.It was just a little painting on a small canvas."Girl, you're great. This way everything will go a lot faster. First I'llmake a few photos with the small digital. That's faster than with theothers. Then we'll have a look at them."I still didn't understand why a photo should look different than theoriginal.Half an hour later I knew. Light and skill of the photographer hadmutated me into a beauty. I scarcely recognized myself again, but wasmore than satisfied with the results. With the conviction that I didn'tlook so much worse than the girls on the pictures, I loosened up.The photographer encouraged me. I've never found the right woman." That is so difficult to believe." And me with you," he agreed. "But the path to true love, as they say..."She shook her head in agreement. "It's not smooth. It's not smooth at all."And, indeed, it never had been for Karen.In a sense, she still thought of herself as a virgin. Perhaps not so in the literal sense, but in an emotional sense there was a truth about this she was too embarrassed to admit. True, she had experimented. There were the men who'd enjoyed her body when times were hard and the doctors' bills most difficult to afford, but she knew for sure that she'd not really relished their affection as much as they apparently did. And, in any case, her scruples had never let her go beyond oral sex. She may have suffered financially as a result, but she had limits she'd set herself, however desperate she might have been.When she was young and not so sure of herself she'd even had sex with women, but this was wholly unsatisfactory and more than.
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