I was not anything of real importance to him. It had been unusual for him to even notice me and pick up on my unhappiness at Aideen’s strict treatment.I spent the rest of the day making preparations for Aideen’s birthday. It was going to be quite a social occasion, with food, drinks, dancing, and lots of guests. I had been told what I was meant to do. Mostly, I was meant to keep food and drinks going, refill people’s glasses if they asked for it, and generally carry out any other service than might be expected of me.I went to bed really tired from all the baking and cooking. For the first time I didn’t miss Fiona beside me for even an instant. I just wanted it all to be over.The birthday party was really difficult. I was run ragged fetching and cleaning. Guests often spilled drinks, and I had to go and clean it up on my knees as they snickered.The worst part was some of the guests were people I knew from school, or Fiona’s outings. The parents didn’t give me a second look, but the. . it’s nothing like that. I’m just, uh . . . we’re, uh, growing up, ya know. And when kids grow up they become curious about, um . . . sex.” It was hard to get the word out but she felt like she had crossed the barrier once she had. “You’ve been a great friend for years, Robby, and I think sometimes maybe I took you for granted. You’ve never tried anything with me but I knew I could count on you if I needed help with anything or someone to talk to.” She felt she was talking in circles and needed to get more direct, or she’d lose her nerve.“I feel ready to . . . uh . . . DO . . .’IT’. And I want my first time to be with someone I can trust. Someone who I know cares about me. Someone that I love.” She finished very quietly, almost a whisper.“You” Robby searched for his voice “love me?”Deanna looked up into his eyes and nodded. “Not like a want to marry you or anything, Robby, but like I feel safe around you, we’ve shared a lot in our lives. I care what happens to you and.
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