“We used to skate outside on a pond. I had a swing made from a tire; it hung from a tree in our front yard. We rode our pony. We picked wild raspberries in the woods”. The little girl was wide-eyed, taking this all in. At last she said “I sure wish I’d gotten to know you sooner!”A pretty young woman, visiting her new doctor for the first time, found herself alone in a small waiting room. She began undressing nervously, preparing herself for the upcoming examination. Just as she draped the last of her garments over the back of a chair, a light rap sounded on the door and a young doctor strode in. Coming to an abrupt halt, the doctor looked his (nude) patient up and down carefully. “Miss Jones” he said finally “It seems quite obvious to me that, until today, you have never had an eye examination”.A hunter was rushed into the emergency room with a bear trap clamped onto his testicles. As the horrified doctor was examining him, he said “Man, how did this happen?” The hunter explains that. Then he stuck a needle in me and here I am. What happened? What day is it?”“It’s Friday. It’s only been a day. You’re national news, Carl!”“Huh?”“Some of the reporters managed to get a satellite feed going while you were in that basement. They reported live on your rescuing the Torquists. They even cut into the afternoon soaps and Oprah. I watched them drag you out of that house!” she told me.“Who are the Torquists? Was that their name? We weren’t really introduced.”“No kidding. That’s the family’s name. Andrea called me when they pulled you out all covered in blood, and she told me the Gulfstream was being fueled up and to get my butt out here. I landed last night, while you were in surgery.”“Huh! Are they alright? The Torquists, I mean. And why are the girls there? And can I get some water?”Marilyn smiled down at me. “You bet, hero.” She poured some water in a glass and held the flex-straw to my lips. I sucked it dry. “Yes, everybody is fine, everybody except you. And Mrs..
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